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alycia if we ever meet again wont let you get away Credits Basecodes: lil.queens Layout: acryliclove |
Saturday, August 29, 2009 always waiting for the moment. planning the moment. XOXO 2:34 AM Wednesday, August 26, 2009 ich vermisse ihn und Stuttgart so viel. XOXO 1:55 AM Monday, August 24, 2009 XOXO 3:03 PM Sunday, August 23, 2009 times flies. last week has been spent doing random stuff and thinking of and missing stuttgart. cant help comparing sg to deutschland for every single thing. simple things like the transport, supermarket, school, people, home etc etc. guess it will take some time. :( still hung up for my life over the past 5 months. the nice weather, the thought that whatever i do doesnt have that great of a consequence or repercussion, the freedom, the fact that i am able to go home at 4, 5 am and noone gives a damn. the fact that i can cook what i want, eat what i want, wash my laundry as and when i want, bath when i want, tidy up my room when i feel like itand do what i want and noone cares. it feels a bit stifling over here having to account for every thing i do :( think its stupid. but i refuse to move on. carry my pink puma bag to school still, using the IZ pen, using tedi tissue, keeping all my euros in my wallet, listening to the flieger lied any chance i could, listening to mikel's songs and missing everything again. :( even changed my bedsheets to the ones i used in straussi. my grandma thinks its stupid. and i felt bad cos she just changed the sheets for me. STUTTGART. I MISS :( XOXO 11:57 PM Friday, August 21, 2009  random laksa eating and meet up with my bao bei in school. bao bei. i never thought we will resort to this. taking pic in the nus toilet. sound so uncool compared to taking photos in uni stuttgart toilet :( bleh. but yes. i feeel so happy seeeing u bao bei! its like i can finally talk abt germany and someone actaully wants to listen or knows what i am talkign aboutwithout feeling annoyed. sigh. bao bei! thanks for being there. we have to help each other get over our withdrawal symtons! i miss stuttgart, deutschland, marce, emma, schwaben gallerie, kaufland, straussi, eating at swee foo's. owning zollin, going for classes, eating buffet, eating with marce and the rest, partying. :(  sorry. i havent kicked the habit of photo taking. after averaging hundreds of photos a day. the impulse to just wipe out my camera is just too great :P feeling touristy in unique singapore.  k box k box!!!!!!!!!! like finally!!!!  day ended with dinner at food republic. beef noodles party! and its so cool. evon is working at uniqlo! means 30% off next purchases! :) XOXO 11:02 PM Wednesday, August 19, 2009 woke up at 2pm when my lec was from 10 to 2pm :( bleh. was thinking if i am going to miss lec anyway, i might as well have stayed on longer in stuttgart. hahaha shit. WHAT AM I THINKING????!!!!! anyway went to cut my hair today.like finally and the first thing my hairdresser said to me was. u grew fatter! bleh.. it doesnt sound nice to hear but i guess i need more of it to push me to get my ass off the chair. sighhh. not hapening soon though. I NEED TO LOOSE ALL THE WEIGHT THAT I GAINED IN DEUTSCHLAND!!!!!!!!!!! PEOPLE, stop me from eating!!!!!!!!!! XOXO 2:26 AM
i dun understand why i have to stand on the left side of the escalator now when i have just gotten used to standing on the right side :(  XOXO 1:38 AM Tuesday, August 18, 2009 got the biggest shock of my life. grocery shopping here is so expensive!!!!!!!! esp the stuff that i usually buy and take for granted in Germany. so fucking ex here! the stuff that i usually eat and buy in Germany(singapore version) SHOP N SAVE meiji milk $2.85 2 cups of strawberry jogurt $1.30x2 cereal $ 5.40 one big container of jogurt $3.50 nutella $1.90 bread $1.60 juice $2.40 box of strawberries $3.90 beer (1 can) $ dunno exactly but ard $3-4 per can Kaufland, Germany (price converted to SGD) milk $0.90 2 cups of strawberry jogurt $ 0.50 x2 cereal (5 times the size of the box in sg) $ 4.90 on big container of jogurt $1.00 nutella(twice the size) $3.80 bread(twice as much) $1.00 juice $1.20 box of strawberries(with thrice as much) $4-5 beer fr $0.60 please look at the words in red and KILL ME. :(:(:( XOXO 1:56 AM
sent omela off in the morning. i barely saw her for two days and she is going to be away for a long 4 months. FASS is going to suck more without her around :( BYE BAbE. TAKE CARE AND I KNOW YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE LOADS OF FUN. JUST REMEMBER TO COME BACK! HEEE :) XOXO 1:37 AM Monday, August 17, 2009 breakfast was porridge with meat and my fav egg with prawn. cooked lovingly by my grandma who knew i missed her egg and prawn. but it felt weird not eating cereal or bread and nutella or milk for breakfast. everything at home feels weird. like everything was exactly how i left them. everything felt familiar but different and strange at the same time( dun ask me how that is possible). it sorts of make the whole germany trip feels like a dream. a long dream from which i have finally awoken. as i did everything, thought about straussaecker. miss my room in germany and the routine i have enterd into there. heart ache a little at the thought that i will probably never see that place or my room ever again :( and the bloody weather! i dun understand how anyone can stand the bloody weather here. its so humid and hot, once i stepped out of my room (air conditioned) i feel like crying. i dun mean to sound so whatever.. but i reallly dun take the heat too well. it makes me so irritated and so frustrated sometimes. and its really hard to adjust back from the drier climate in europe. went to ION the new mall to meet jo in the evening and it felt so strange again! seeing all the black hair and hardly any caucasians. strange.. and i feel so ordinary and plain here. in Europe i stand out simply becasue i am asian and i get attention whether good or bad. here i am just nobody in the sea of Singaporeans :( somehow that doesnt feel so good :( XOXO 1:40 AM Sunday, August 16, 2009 i ventured my first step out into singapore air for the first time in 5.5 months and i almost died. yes the humidity was that suffocating.felt like someone thrown a warm and thick blanket over me. it was baddddddddddd that and the feeling of loss was so overwhelming i wanted to cry but i couldnt. guess the tears ran out ytd. i felt like going back into the stoning/dazed state i was since saturday but ai fung was waiting for me. then my family came. could tell my mum misses me. she was like going to cry too...and i hugged her and i cried too. and when i hugged my grandma too.sigh. i always thought noone could cry like qiling. guess the tears are free flow these two days. went out for dinner with family and the feeling was weird. the weather was weird, everyone was speaking weirdly, i dun seee any caucasians, i dun hear any German. and EVERYTHING WAS STRANGE. went back home and got a huge surprise! jo and omela hid in my room and decorated it with ballons and hearts( so in sync with my birthday theme) haha and had a birthday cake. cried again when i saw them. didnt understand why. dun understand what feeling it was. just felt very glad that they were there. there and then.  with the hearts that say " WELCOME HOME ALYCIA" :)  thank you babes. XOXO 1:10 AM Saturday, August 15, 2009 i went to swaben gallerie for the last time to print photos and the fact that i was never going to see this place again hurts. after all, it had been a familiar sight for the past 5 months. and in my daze i heard someone call me and it was sergi and irem. they bade me farewell, both gave me a final hug and final kiss and the tears were threatening to fall. sergi then give me one last hug and i was feelign so miserable that i was never goign to see them again, the tears just came. had to run off before the sobbing starts. :( reached the hauptbahnhof to send qiling off and the atmosphere wasnt very good. marce was trying to be strong and trying to bring up the atmosphere like how she always does. but it just wasnt working that day. qiling hugged her grandma for the last time and it was sadnesss. seeing qi ling waving to the back view of her leaving grandma was heart wrenching. then the dreaded train had to come. by then qiling, emma and i were crying non stop again. we watched as the train pulled away, pulled away as qi ling was still waving at us from the interior of the train through the windows. you will never understand how it feels till u experience it yourself. seeing someone u love pull away is tragic. and the feeling is undescribably saddd. the sadnesss just floods you. yes i know its stupid cos i will be seeing teo qiling soon in singapore. but i guess it was just the mood that day. everything was sad. :( teo qi ling... just want to thank you for being here on this special journey in my life with me. there will never be so much tears and laughter without you here( literally). and you put so much laughter, much more than u can expect and imagine into my life over the past 5 months. and this dream is for us ending, but we just have to carry on and be glad that it happened ya? wont be 24/7 by your side anymore in sg so i give u this pic, and hope that evrytime you are upset, u remember this pizza eis, and hope it brings the smile back to your face. :) I LOVE U BAO BEI!  went back to an empty house and my tears were threatening tofall each time i cleared the toilet of my stufff, cleared the kitchen of all my stuff, cleared the wardrobe, cleared evrything. and looking at everything fills me up with even more grief, every neighbour's door, every item in the house, even the toilets and kitchen cos it will be the last time i will be seeing them again. i was depressed that my neighbours werent there to say goodbye. but thinking back, it was probably better. i cant imagine saying good bye to them. its too hard. left them all a goodbye letter and a singapore flag. STEPHAN, FRANZ, MIKEL, CHRIS AND ADRIAN please come to singapore soon! MAN TRIFFT IMMER ZWEIMAL INS LEBEN! :(  locked the room for the last time. and the tears fell again. the trip to the main station was horrible, and we soon erupted into another crying session when the train came. and when daniel kissed me goodbye and said one kiss was from fabrizio too. it was just painful. and emma kissing u repeatedly with tears in her big big eyes were just too painful to look at. and marce who was trying not to cry and holding you so dear, you wonder how you can ever say goodbye.  Good bye my friends. it was one hell of a good time we had together. emma told me on the train. there is a difference between never seeing each other again and not seeing each other for a long time. i hope long is not too long. the train pulled again like it had to and i was left all alone in the train. travelling to reality. how do i ever get over all this? XOXO 1:42 AM Friday, August 14, 2009 and i felt so stupid for wiping everything a second time and mopping the floor a second time when the hausmeister conveniently just walked into my room with his shoes :( he then asked for mikel, becasue i asked mikel to return the keys for me as i wanted to stay for a night more in the room. and since they werent open on sat, i could only return the keys on mon, by which i would have been in Singapore( dun cry dun cry) :( and it was the first time i saw mikel talking so seriously to anyone. and i was secretly impressed.cos he looked so serious and responsible at that point in time. like he actually felt like someone u can depend on :) lucky i am leaving soon. otherwise with all the things he has been doing and saying lately, i would have fell for him. hahahah yes. NEIGHBOUR FROM HELL. anyway went ard with qiling to settle admin stuff. collect deposit for the room, terminated our insurance, and closed down the bank acct. also did some last min postcard shopping and taking last photos of stuttgart. prob good that we were kept occupied cos at least, i didnt have to think abt the fact that i was leaving the next day :( XOXO 3:13 AM Thursday, August 13, 2009 DUN COME BACK. SINGAPORE SUCKS. how do i leave stutttgart???? :( and the prospect of humid singapore with the stiffling weather is such a turn off. and the thought of no more partying, no more cheap alcohol, no more bier, no more german neighbours, no more marce, emma is enough to drive anyone to depression :( addicted to my new found freedom. i wonder how i am going to get used to living with my family again :( went with qi ling and zollin to do the ex matriculation, and then we had our last chinese buffet at stadtmitte. and qiling teo surprised me again. i just casually mentioned that i love the stuttgarter hofbraeu mug that i had my radler in, and she was like, ok i am going to steal it for u bao bei. and she casually stood up and took the mug and hid it in her bag! and we hurried out of the shop before i could stop gawking and get over my disbelief!!! like omg!!!!!!!!!!! shoflifting!!!!!!!! hahaha oh wells. I DO LOVE THE MUG. ENOUGH TO HAND CARRY IT ALL THE WAY BACK OK! HAHAHA sent zollin off at the airport and it was once again sad to see someone go off. but this time at least, there was the reassuring thought that i will be able to see him again in sg. .. ZOLLIN NG! thanks for all that u have done for us( the two troublesome sg girls in stuttgart) and whom u always get owned by. really appreciate everything, every single thing that u have done for me! i am realy glad to have met u in stuttgart! :):) after that it was back to strausssi to do my packing. with every photo that i tear down from my wall, and every thing that i threw, my heart just got heavier :( i really love my room. my lovely room. i really really hate to leave this place :( XOXO 3:12 AM Wednesday, August 12, 2009  :( XOXO 3:12 AM
First visit to the casino as a 21 yr old! :) Franz and Mikel brought me to the casino today and it was so exciting cos it was my first time in a casino! and u should have seen the first time they dressed up for it.. they were actually dressed in a tux, and as any girl will tell you, guys in tux are HOT. and so i uncooly, and unknowingly and unexpectedly let out a "WHOA" when i saw Franz in a tux for the first time. too bad i didnt take a photo then.. i guess they realised the dress code wasnt that strict cos they didnt dressed so formally this time round. although i was hoping they would both wear a tux again when they told me they were going to the casino. heeee but oh wells. franz still looks as good as ever.  neighbour from hell and franz stuttgart casino. albeit a small one. but we have to start small no? :) and i felt so bad cos i forgot to bring my passport along AND WE HAD TO DRIVE HOME TO GET IT. and it was a relatively long drive to the casino! and i was so scared mikel with his temper was going to blow up at me and be upset at me. but he COMPLETELY SURPRISED ME. I KEPT APOLOGISING AND I FELT SO BAD I OFFEREED TO STAY AND WAIT FOR THEM OUTSIDE WHILE THEY WENT IN. but mikel just put his arms ard my shoulders and told me it was ok and told me not to worry abt it! like omg! the neighbour from hell! and with the patrick he bought me, he has been so nice to me recently! :):):):) and he even agreed to help me return my room keys to the janitor! like i swear if he continues being so nice. i will fall in love with the NEIGHBOUR FROM HELL. hahahah  lets play a luck game!  and the biggest winner for the night was franz. lucky guy. he won 221 euros! like omg! thats almost enough to cover one months' rent! he told me that he has never won so much before and that i was his lucky fairy :) so i made him treat me to a caprinhna :) XOXO 1:22 AM Monday, August 10, 2009 BAO BEI AND MARCE COMES BACK FROM BARCELONA TODAY!!!!!!!!! SO HAPPY. REALLY MISSED THEM LOADS WHILE THEY WERENT HERE! :( ITS A HAPPY DAY!!!!!!!!!!! :)  had ice with qiling and christian. last time i am going to see him in stuttgart. bye young man! you are the only one whose swearing can make me burst out in laughter! :) you are too cute! i understand why qi ling is so in love with you now! would love to have you as my little brother! :) hope to see u in sg next yr! XOXO 3:11 AM Sunday, August 09, 2009 ANYWAY HAPPY 44TH BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE! HAHAH XOXO 3:10 AM Saturday, August 08, 2009  mikel with his stamps :) mikel asked me if i wanted to go shopping with him today! think he knew i was bored because no one else was at home! and he wanted to go change his 30 stamps which he collected from his 30 cartons of milk for a new bowl! :)  waiting for the s bahn.  he makes me laugh :) XOXO 3:10 AM Friday, August 07, 2009 went home alone to a empty house and i miss him already. i miss chris sitting at the sofa watching tv and saying hi to him when i go home. miss eating dinner or lunch with him, miss watching german tv with him, miss fighting with him over patrick, miss seeing him argue with stephan over i dunno what. miss seeing him and adrian play x box. miss bitching with him about mikel, miss chris :( wanted company but there wasnt anyone. qiling and marce were off to barcelona and i cant think of anyone else i wanted to talk to. am very depressed :( XOXO 3:09 AM Thursday, August 06, 2009  patrick's the star because everyone wants to take photos with him! :P  goodbye my dear neighbours! will remember what u told me alex! man trifft immer zweimal ins leben! man always meet twice in a lifetime. or more! so till next time! :)  me and chris :) XOXO 3:08 AM |