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alycia if we ever meet again wont let you get away Credits Basecodes: lil.queens Layout: acryliclove |
Sunday, May 28, 2006 when this primary school girl step down so that she was standing on level ground as me. i didnt know what she was up to then. it was only in the taxi that my aunt who had been looking at her all the while told me what she was doing. yup. she was asking her sister to see who was taller. ok you win. happy? i thought tt i was pretty much used to this kind of situation. but somehow it didnt felt that good. i also know that she prob didnt mean much when she did tt. but still, small gestures like this can sometimes... well.. hurt a little. i know i should just get over it and not let small things like this get me down, since there is nothing i can do anyway. but easier said than done :( XOXO 7:23 PM
eventful past week. but hooray! the hols are here! lalala had gp exam ytd. total crap. i freaking didnt know how to ans the compre qn right from question no. 1. aq was randomly writing words. whatever words tt come to my mind in the last ten minutes i had to finish the entire paper. summary was.... um... ok. dun wanna talk abt it anymore. gp is over watched da vinci code ytd. nice nice. esp with the great company. shu hui,aly and kaka. think silas is so pitiful. the physical and emtional trauma he underwent only to be betrayed in the end. to hell with all the pple who made use of him. show was not bad overall. i want to watch the omen next. haha went study with jo today. and so i was like readin my econs notes and jo was doing her phy or chem tutorial and then we suddenly heard someone screaming for help! it was damn loud. everyone was damn shock cos well, i guess its not everyday tt u get to hear someone shouting for help right? my first thought was tt it was just one of those senseless people pulling a prank but the shouting continued and it sounded quite real so yup. then my fertile imagination led me to believe tt someone was being murdered and i was actually expecting all the blood and stuff already. and so being key pos, we headed towards the source of all the commotion and saw this malay guy sprawled on the floor. i actuaslly thought he was either dead or severly injured before i saw his hands twitched. well it turns out tt the guy was having fits. it was kind of horrible how his body jerked and he was having some kind of spasm. oh wells. XOXO 12:21 AM Friday, May 19, 2006 and i hate it. what i wouldnt give to get out of this. do u have the feeling that somtimes, the more u know, the worse u feel? that is exactly the feeling i am experiencing now. somehow the more i find out abt stuff, the more horrible i feel. i dun want to find out about things anymore esp when they make me sad. sometimes, i wish i were the kid at AWWA. cos if i were the autistic kid at AWWA, i will be in my own world. a world that belongs to me and me alone. i dun have to bother about what other people think and i wouldnt have a sense of what is gg on around me. maybe its better to be ignorant.everything, everybody is changing. for goodness sake stop taking me for granted. i have feelings too.i cant grasp on. i hate this feeling i have been carrying around for the past few days. the feeling of heaviness in your chest which refuse to subside, when emotions get out of hand at the slightest provokation and eyes water. and the feeling of wanting to cry, but the tears just wouldnt come. i wish someone would just give me a good tight slap and harsh words, just so that i can cry. cos i might just explode at the chest if i dun. and econs lesson doesnt help either. hml keeps berating me. and when she does i feel like crying, screaming and shouting at her but instead i kept quiet. her words are like heavy stones, adding weight on to the already too heavy chest. i guess its true that i pretty much keep things to myself. but i really cant tell anyone. i wish i could tell someone what happened to my home, i wish i could tell someone what really is bothering me, i wish i could tell someone what i really want. but there is no one such someone. i want to cry in someone's shoulders and let it all out, to let out everything that has been bugging me since i was 5 or 6. but there is no one. so for now, everyhting still has to be bottled up. XOXO 11:00 PM Tuesday, May 09, 2006 i mean. well. she FINALLY decided to change the layout. you owe me big time now, alycia. ((: how about passing me the money you've saved so far for your mp3! -TERESA XOXO 4:30 PM |